You desperately want your guy back; he was the one who broke off with and you have been heartbroken – wondering what on earth you can do to get him back without a magic wand.
If he is still so heavily on your mind and you want to get him back, you might have broken up only recently.
Maybe you have actually been apart for quite some time, but you feel stuck, as if you can’t move on – surely there are good, proven ways that will do the trick to get him back?
Falling in love with someone makes it hard to just delete them from your mind
A person whom you grow so attached to becomes a part of you, and it can take years to move on for some .
But before we give you these powerful and proven ways to get him to make him want you more than ever, are you sure you are ready to have him back?
Is he worthy of coming back into your life?
Because sometimes you have to be honest with yourself and accept that he really is gone this time and he isn’t coming back.
I mean look at these couple of things we have lined up for you here:
- Did he cheat on you?
- Was he constantly lying to you?
- Did he disrespect and underestimate you in your relationship?
- Did he physically or verbally ever abuse you?
What Will I Learn?
- 13 Proven Things That Will Help You to Get Your Ex Guy Back
- 1) Cut out all communication
- 2) What went wrong in the relationship?
- 4) Apologizing, if necessary
- 4) Focus on your needs
- 6) Work on improving yourself
- 7) All that will make him jealous in a good way, not a possessive way
- 8) Have you taken his stuff back to him yet?
- 9) Widen your horizons
- 10) There will be just the right time to get in touch with him
- 11) Talk to his friends
- 13) Take things slowly
- 13) Trigger his emotional buttons
- Do read these tips and don’t forget to do them…
- Frequently Asked Questions(FAQs)
There are good reasons not to go back though
If you answered ‘yes’ to just one of the questions above, you have to ask yourself if you are seriously really thinking of getting back with your ex again.
The above are red flags and you should rather be turning your back on him forever.
OK, you might believe that he will change for you but it is not so.
Researchers say that people who cheat in a relationship are three times more likely to cheat on the next partner!
Your ex must have made you believe that you couldn’t function without him and that might be why you want him back.
If you did answer yes to any of the above questions, it is strongly recommended that you go and talk to a therapist explaining how you feel regarding the breakup and the reasons as well.
Explain why you want your guy back.
The therapist will help you to get a more meaningful insight into what you need to do and what will be your best solution for the situation you are in.
How to make him want you back
If you are determined to wholeheartedly win your guy back, then one thing you must always remember to keep and that is your dignity.
That means you should never beg him to take you back or go out of your way to try and get him to notice you.
And definitely no stalking!
Any of these things are guaranteed to fail, and will only end up with you being the disappointed and frustrated one.
He must learn to respect you and appreciate you so that he feels a better person for being with you.
He should see that you are perfectly good at being on your own without him and that you are giving him space to make the effort to win you back and be part of your life again.
13 Proven Things That Will Help You to Get Your Ex Guy Back
1) Cut out all communication
That will mean no contacting him on FB, phoning or texting him, and no types of social media.
You should stick to the no-contact rule for some time.
Give yourself time and space to start being the desirable person that he will want to get to know all over again.
As soon as you stop being in his space, he is going to wonder why you are so ‘unavailable’.
He is going to miss you and start to wonder more about you, thinking more about you.
2) What went wrong in the relationship?
Think about the things that broke the two of you up.
Was it you who broke up the relationship or was it him?
If there was anything wrong that you did that caused the breakup, now is the perfect time to ponder on it and start improving yourself in that direction.
So that if he comes back, you have overcome that thing and he sees a new positive, carefree, independent woman that drives him crazy.
He will wonder what is so intriguing and different about you.
You have detected the errors that you might have made in the previous relationship and overcome them, to your benefit.
That might mean:
4) Apologizing, if necessary
When he ended the relationship, did you yell and throw things all over the place, swearing and shouting that you would never speak to him again, ever!
Or maybe you said something that you wish you could take back.
If you are guilty of them, you should think about apologizing to him before proceeding with anything else.
A lot of people think that if they apologize, their ex will probably think they are weak, but this is just the opposite.
Apologizing takes courage, bravery, and maturity.
It means you are aware of your mistakes and acknowledge them.
It means, to him, that you are moving on with your life and forgetting all that happened in the past.
He will see that you have really changed and might even be suspicious that you are dating someone new.
4) Focus on your needs
It is very important at this stage to focus on what really makes you happy; like doing the things you enjoy doing – doing things that bring a genuine smile to your face.
- Do you love soaking up in spas with scented candles?
- Do you love shopping or spending time with friends sitting and chatting at the coffee shop?
You need to do whatever makes you happy, not listlessly lying around at home, thinking only about him, unable to function without him by your side.
That, for sure, is not going to help you succeed.
If your guy knew that that’s how you would be without him, he would flee a mile!
You have to take good care of yourself away from a guy, and do things that keep you on track and on top of your game.
That way you will end up ten times more attractive to him and ten times happier.
When he does see you one day, and you want him back in your life, he must find that you are still highly attractive and you still rock!!
5) He needs to see that you are happy, carefree, and independent without him
There’s nothing more off-putting or repulsive than being a person who is needy and desperate for someone.
He needs to see that you act around him like you don’t care about him – you have a life without him, and you are very happy in that.
When he sees how genuinely happy you are without him in your life, in all probability he will want to come back.
A sexy woman is a happy, independent, confident woman who doesn’t have to shout and be a loudmouth to try and get attention.
He will want some of your happiness and quiet confidence to rub off onto him!
6) Work on improving yourself
If you have literally been pining away without him, moping, not having the strength to groom yourself properly, nor put on makeup, go out and do exercises, or go to work or college, or something, it is understandable that you might be in a state of depression.
That will require professional assistance.
If you are not depressed, you need to work on improving yourself and it is highly important if you want to get your guy back.
You need to get yourself in shape, watch your diet, drink plenty of water, and get back into nature.
That will get you back in tune with yourself.
Who can resist a hot chick that takes care of her looks, shape, and her future, etc.?
7) All that will make him jealous in a good way, not a possessive way
Making a guy jealous of you means you have achieved something; you are probably someone who attracts guys because of who you are; a confident and happy woman.
If you can make the guy you are after jealous about the attention you are getting, it is going to benefit you in a lot of ways.
But you have to make him jealous in a subtle way, not in a mean, careless, way.
Maybe on Facebook, you could post happy pics of yourself with a male friend.
He might show jealousy about your mysteriousness – who on earth are you hanging out with!
8) Have you taken his stuff back to him yet?
Is your room crammed with a lot of his stuff from days gone by; that you are reluctant to get rid of because it still feels a bit like he is there?
Taking it back to him will make you happier because he won’t be on your mind constantly.
Taking it back will also make him see this gorgeous ‘changed for the better’ girl and give him a good reason to want to be back in your life again.
Once again, you might evoke some jealousy in him because he sees you looking so yummy and happy.
He might think that you are bringing his stuff back because you have moved on and might even have found someone new.
9) Widen your horizons
Now is the time in your life when you want to get your ex back; even if you are someone in a new relationship – to start finding hobbies that you love or activities you enjoy doing.
- Like how’s about a sky jumping club, or a photography club, what about even volunteering at a dog and cat rescue facilities?
- What about studying something?
There is nothing more attractive than someone with a degree or diploma behind them and busy and happy in a job or a passion they love doing with that certificate!
10) There will be just the right time to get in touch with him
Many women make the fatal mistake of contacting their ex but at the wrong time.
There is actually a good time; a perfect time to contact him.
When would that be, you ask.
Well, the wrong time would be the day after you broke up, for instance, even a few weeks after your breakup.
Because in this time both of you need to be coming to your senses and taking in all that has happened.
This will enable you to recharge yourself, focus on other things, and hopefully move forward.
The perfect time to get back in touch with him would be, say, about four weeks after the breakup, after you’ve done all the above things listed above.
In those four weeks, you would have worked on improving yourself.
Let him see a better you over those drinks!
11) Talk to his friends
Say now you can’t get in touch with him or you are too nervous to.
It is not the end of the world to talk to his friends instead if you were their friends before.
If the subject switches to you and the ex, you can tell his friends how well you are doing and they will see how good you look.
There’s a good chance that the next time they see him, they will fill him in on their chat with you, and how positive and happy you appeared.
They will tell him that as far as they can see, you are genuinely happy and living the life!
13) Take things slowly
That speaks for itself.
When you do start communicating with him again or you go out for a friendly drink, you need to make sure that he sees you are doing it on a friendly basis (your acting skills will come in handy here!).
Just a friendly casual meetup will let him see that you are not desperate to get back together with him again.
Because if he feels that you are chasing him or rushing to get things started up again, he will immediately feel pressure and nothing good will come of it.
If he sees you are just being friendly, he will start working hard to prove to you that he is worthy to come back into your life.
His ego won’t want to believe that you see him only as a friend and not a potential lover!
When you push all of his emotional buttons, triggering off an emotional desire for you, this will bring him back to you soon.
You don’t know how to trigger his emotional buttons?
You let him see that you value his advice and help – that he means something to you.
Do read these tips and don’t forget to do them…
- Do remember it is important is to never to let him see you are still head over hills in love with him.
- Do make it a challenge for him to get you back.
- Do always pretend that he needs to try harder to impress you – you’re not just an easy target.
- Do laugh at his jokes, but don’t be raucous like overdoing it so that he thinks you are entirely won over and how easy it was. Let him know he has to make a serious effort if he wants to win you back, that there are plenty of other guys who are interested in you.
- Don’t just fall for it immediately you see he is trying to win you over.
- Don’t ruin your game by showering him with tons and tons of affection. Guys are the hunters by nature – they like the game of chasing and proving themselves to you.
- Don’t act jealous around him. He will think of you as insecure if you do. Other women might approach him but don’t become upset immediately – remember you are not back together yet. If he sees you are totally cool about it and chilled out, he will try and make you jealous because he is interested in you!
- Don’t ever use begging or pity to get him back – because then he will know he has the ability to manage your happiness and he won’t be interested in pursuing you – no challenge for him. Men enjoy women who are happy on their own and who know what they want; that they don’t need a man to keep them going.
- Don’t call him or text him constantly. That will make him think you are desperate and want him back, no matter what! You don’t want him believing that you are sitting next to your phone the whole day waiting for the breadcrumbs he gives. You have to get across to him that you don’t need him and that if you do come back, he will have to make an effort to get you and show you he is worthy of you.
- Don’t let him take advantage of you. He has to prove with his actions that he wants you back, otherwise see red flags blowing.
- Don’t let him call you in the small hours of the morning, like as if he is just interested in a booty call. Never let him take advantage of you, no matter how much you adore him. Your dignity comes first and you don’t just dance to his tune!
- Don’t talk to him about his and your relationship or his love life. Don’t discuss or ask him about re-entering each other’s lives to start the relationship again. All you need to be doing is concentrating on ways to make him want you back. He must be the one to conclude that he wants you back. If you ask to get back into the relationship, he will believe that you are head over heels for him still and that you must have been desperate without him all this time. Act like you don’t give a damn about his love life.
- Don’t be cold, nasty, or aloof with him. These are all negative things that usually end with negative results. A cool, calm, collected peaceful person is highly attractive because they exhibit positive energy.
Frequently Asked Questions(FAQs)
Does my ex really love his new girlfriend seeing as we broke up so recently?
In most cases, the answer to that will be, not likely that he loves his new girlfriend.
It is highly possible that he is in a rebound relationship and rebound relationships usually end sooner or later.
He might be very taken with the new girl at the moment but that doesn’t mean he loves her or that she is going to be his future wife, or that he will love her in the same way he loved you.
Even though my ex has a new girlfriend he still talks to me and calls me. What does that mean?
If your ex still calls you and wants to speak to you even with a girlfriend, it probably means that he still has feelings for you.
But still, that is not a sign that he wants you back or that he even will come back. But this article, as you have seen, is about maximizing your chances of getting him back if you really want him back.
Even if he did leave you for a new girlfriend, it doesn’t mean he won’t be back. He might well be in a rebound relationship.
Do rebound relationships end or work out?
A lot of rebound relationships can well turn into real intimate relationships that can last years, even decades.
Luckily, though, this article will teach you ways to maximize your chances of getting him back.
You need to start focusing on preparing yourself so you can become the woman of his dreams and we have listed ways you can do that in this article.
Learning how to get your man back is going to take effort and some changes from you.
It might be hard and you might even want to give up.
The reason being, it will mean you have to face up to your own flaws and address them.
But if you believe your man is worth it, then you need to keep on keepin’ on.
Hopefully, from following the tips above, you might get your guy back and find you end up with an even stronger relationship than before.
Maybe, you might even get to hear your guy whispering in your ear, ‘I knew I made a big mistake when I lost you!’
But if he still doesn’t want you back, move away and forward because ‘remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of luck!’